Vampires, Ghosts, Immortals

There’s something very fishy about this business of so-called immor­tals that I see in movies and books. I mean, they don’t seem very smart, given that they’ve stuck around for hundreds or thousands of years.

There isn’t really a happy ending to these stories. If he happens to be a bad guy, he’ll invari­ably get himself killed in some rather stupid way, like allowing someone to put a stake through his heart. If he’s a good guy, he’ll live a long lonely brooding life — that is the essen­tial romance of the plot – until he kills the bad guy in some stupid way, like putting a stake through his heart. After that he’ll happily continue to live a long lonely brooding life.

On a side note, I don’t recall having seen many good gals – woman as the protag­o­nist — in these kinds of stories. I guess they just aren’t suited for such depressing roles, or maybe that stuff just isn’t marketable. I’m not sure how many actresses other than Kate Beckin­sale can pull off the “depressed-yet-cool” act.

So now that we’re on the topic, how smart are the immor­tals anyway? The last time somebody asked, I couldn’t remember what I had for dinner the previous week, but these guys – the immor­tals – always have flash­backs of ancient memories popping into their heads at some crucial times and lending the audience the much-desired “aw..” moments. I mean seriously, just because these guys live forever doesn’t mean they remember every­thing, do they? Even R. Daneel Olivaw had to have his memory-banks archived to tape (in a manner of speaking) on a semi-regular basis.

And then of course, there’s the mechanics of it all that’s inter­esting, to say the least. Take ghosts, for instance. I think it’s fairly well-established that ghosts retain their souls but not their brains. On the other hand, even religious people will agree that the brain does the thinking, even if the higher aspects of humanity – free will, conscious­ness etc – may be controlled by the soul. So what’s doing the thinking and the remem­bering for ghosts?

Or maybe — is that why the don’t-do-anything-stupid switch is turned off?